Normal

Wow, has it really been that long (how many times has one read that phrase in a blog!).

Life is such a fight sometimes. In the last few months, my wife has had viral meningitis, we refinanced our house, an old friend died of heroine overdose, there was Thanksgiving, Christmas and NewYears which were mostly great, my sister-in-law got engaged and is now expecting, I bailed my future brother-in-law out of jail (after getting engaged he decided to make things right and turn himself in for past warrants - he's really a good guy, has turned his life completely around the last year or so), and my grandmother just died last weekend. I go to services in southern Cal next week... No wonder I have been such a wreck... C'est la vie. And there's more but if I write about it I will be entering that "complaining" space that is just not good for the soul. The fact is, I am blessed. Despite all of this, I'm doing okay. I'm learning to stop trying for "normal". This is normal. When I was single and complaining of being alone I had all the time in the world to manage my life so that it was "normal". Now, I am not alone (a small army occupies my home), and my life doesn't look anything like what I thought normal life should be. It's wonderfully erratic, unpredictable, and sometimes I find myself staring hard at it so as not to forget it. When I'm lame I complain about it's idiosyncrasies, when I'm in my right mind I breathe deeply and enjoy it's scent. So there you go. That's what's up with me. Ciao.